Spanish dating rituals
Through this "human-bridge", the bachelor can also ask permission to visit the woman at home from the bachelorette's father.
As a norm, the couple will not be left alone with each other during this first home visit, because formal introductions to family members are done, which may be performed by the "tulay". During this preliminary evaluation period, the Filipino woman will either deny her feelings (or the absence of feelings for the suitor) and avoids her admirer, or does not become angry because of the teasing and encourages the suitor instead.
During the courtship process, a traditional Filipina is expected to play "hard to get", to act as if not interested, to be not flirty, and show utmost restraint, modesty, shyness, good upbringing, be well-mannered, demure, and reserved despite having great feelings for her admirer; a behavior culturally considered appropriate while being courted.With regards to the engagement and pre-marriage stages, Filipino tradition dictates that the man and his parents perform the pamamanhikan (literally, a Tagalog word that means "to go up the stairs of the house" of the girlfriend and her parents; pamamanhikan is known as tampa or danon to the Ilocanos, as pasaguli to the Palaweños, and as kapamalai to the Maranaos and blessings from her parents in order to marry.This is when the formal introduction of the man's parents and woman's parents happens.On the other hand, the Filipino man fears rejection by a woman and would like to avoid losing face and embarrassment.This teasing phase actually helps in circumventing such an embarrassing predicament because formal courtship has not yet officially started.
Conservativeness, together with repressing emotions and affection, was inherited by the Filipino woman from the colonial period under the Spaniards, a characteristic referred to as the Maria Clara attitude.